Occupational Hazard 3!

Posted: February 14, 2013 in Wandering Thoughts
Tags: , , , , , , ,

Helen Keller said, “We would never learn to be brave and patient if there were only joy in the world.”  I wish she were wrong. Disappointments leave me with the unpleasant task of squashing, crushing, and squeezing life’s lemons to make something palattable.

Albert Einstein failed his college entrance exam. Walt Disney was fired from his first media job. Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team. And how about Abraham Lincoln? Take the time to read about his life and the major disappointments he experienced. i get it? BUT!

One of the hardest things to do in a this world where everything is immediate, is to just let myself experience a feeling for more than a moment.

i admit that i am not very good at allowing the experiencing of emotions in full without trying to speed up the process. The only time i had this ability was when i was a young child priort to being told or taught what is socially acceptable.

I’m not suggesting that i should lock myself away for weeks at a time when i am disappointed, but to be aware of any sense of obligation to “just get over it” is in my mind just as wrong as hiding away. In this bout with disappointment, i am working on allowing myself to feel what i’m feeling without any agenda of speeding up the process.

Today i let it all out with a friend, i shared it all and left no doubt about what my disappointments were. The wonderful thing about letting it out was that i gave myself that time.

Disappointment can dig it’s way to the core of who i am. If i don’t know what my core values are, i may not have the inner strength to support me when i experience negative emotions.

When someone disappoints me and I feel like withdrawing, i remember my core value, then pause and make a choice.

I wish to be an open-hearted person. These negative feelings are feelings, and they will pass. Do I choose to remain open-hearted, or do I choose to follow the easier instinct and close off?

More often than not, I choose to be in line with my values over the automatic response to the situation. It doesn’t happen every single time, but most.

I have to accept that I will continue to be disappointed—that it is a part of life. I also have to accept that I will probably continue to struggle to accept this fact, at various points throughout the rest of my life!

This step is a lifelong challenge and fundamental to dealing with disappointment. I will be disappointed, I will disappoint, you will be disappointed, and you will disappoint. Life will be disappointing—but it will pass.

Practice acceptance and i may suffer less as it is happening and notice the good things in life more.

Disappointment is a part of life, but all parts of life help me grow.


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