Talking To Myself… A Moment Of Silence Please!!!

Posted: January 21, 2014 in Podcasts, Talking To Myself...
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PLEASE CLICK ON THE PLAYER OR THE LINK BELOW TO LISTEN.

“The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.”  Terry Pratchett

It’s a golden rule to think before you speak, but i can run into trouble when i think so much that i fail to act, or think myself into a state of uncontrollable anxiety.

What is stopping me from getting the results i want? i’m coming to believe that one of the reasons is a self-imposed roadblock. It’s identity is thinking too much.

For many this may be one the problem that draws people to books and websites on self-help and one of the things that keeps them from achieving what they want even after they have gained a lot of helpful advice.

After having read a few books, i think… and then plan… and then i think a little more. Often i get lost in my thinking. Being an over-thinker and getting my hands on personal development information becomes just another way for me to creatively procrastinate. But then i can call it making progress.

Stop… i’m not saying that educating myself or thinking is something bad. But overdoing it won’t help me either. Why not? Well for one thinking can’t take the place of action.

Wishing that if i just think enough i can find some easy way to get what i want without having to actually do something.

Without taking action it’s likely that I won’t get what i want. Thinking is seldom as scary or uncertain as taking the leap into the unknown and taking action.

The second problem with over-thinking is that it may over-complicate things.

Seriously, aren’t things complicated enough? But is it possible that it’s me who’s making them more so?

By over thinking things i make things more and more complicated… in your mind. In a short period of time i can turn something fairly simple into really complicated.

A problem here is that when what i’m doing is complicated i begin to think that it must be important. And so i feel important. i derive a sense of importance from making things into big struggles. Much of my struggle is in my head. There is some surprise and even relief to find out that I have been making my life more complicated than it needs to be.

Another pitfall of over thinking things is that I may not perform at my best.

If i over think things i may become nervous and start to second guess myself all the time. It also becomes harder to focus on doing something when i have a habit of thinking a lot. i may slip into future scenarios in my mind instead focusing on what i’m doing right now.

All of this can cripple my performance and produce results that are worse than they could have or should have been.

So how do I stop thinking so much or in fact get myself to shut up?

I’ll settle for a steady flow of progress so here are three things i’m going to use to cultivate the habit of not over thinking things.

Awareness…

The most important thing is to be aware that i tend to over think. And to keep being aware of that in my everyday life. A practical application for this may be the use of post-it notes that say “Don’t overthink things.”

Goals…

Instead of thinking about something for days, i tell myself that i have – for example – 30 minutes to think. Then i will make a decision.

The Now…

Focus on what’s in front of me instead of drifting off to the past or future for long periods of time. It would serve me better to stay in the present and let the right actions naturally arise.

In Closing… “Just because I liked something at one point in time doesn’t mean I’ll always like it, or that I have to go on liking it at all points in time as an unthinking act of loyalty to who I am as a person, based solely on who I was as a person. To be loyal to myself is to allow myself to grow and change, and challenge who I am and what I think. The only thing I am for sure is unsure, and this means I’m growing, and not stagnant or shrinking.”  Jarod Kintz

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