Average… A Loss Of Identity!

Posted: November 12, 2014 in Average..., Podcasts
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Please click the link below to listen.

Welcome to me and I Am. i’m your host Dr. ed peterson.

Every generation has its life-defining moments. If you want to find out what it was for a member of the so called Greatest Generation, you ask: “Where were you on D-Day?” For baby boomers, the questions are: “Where were you when Kennedy was shot?” or “What were you doing when Nixon resigned?” For Generation X, those born between 1965 and 1980—there is only one question: “When did your parents get divorced?” Life has been forever changed by the answer to that question.

i don’t believe that anyone ever gets married planning for divorce. In fact just the opposite, everyone says things like, “Whatever happens, we’re never going to get divorced.” But, while we don’t plan for divorce, we also don’t plan for success. We just sorta take it as comes and when push comes to shove… divorce becomes an option.

UnknownThe topic of divorce is sensitive and would appear to be somewhat difficult to nail down and to complex to understand. That’s not due to the fact that God isn’t clear. It’s due to the fact that sin has muddled up the world so badly that we tend to be unable to think in terms of the clarity and the simplicity of the mind of God.

God’s Design For Marriages…

One day in Matthew 19 the Pharisees were badgering Jesus: “Is it legal for a man to divorce his wife for any reason?” He answered, “Haven’t you read in your Bible that the Creator originally made man and woman for each other, male and female? And because of this, a man leaves father and mother and is firmly bonded to his wife, becoming one flesh—no longer two bodies but one. Because God created this organic union of the two sexes, no one should desecrate his art by cutting them apart.”

They shot back in rebuttal, “If that’s so, why did Moses give instructions for divorce papers and divorce procedures?”

Jesus said, “Moses provided for divorce as a concession to your hard heartedness, but it is not part of God’s original plan. I’m holding you to the original plan, (I’m holding you to be more than average.) and holding you liable for adultery if you divorce your faithful wife and then marry someone else. I make an exception in cases where the spouse has committed adultery.”

Jesus’ disciples objected, “If those are the terms of marriage, we’re stuck. Why get married?”

i love how Jesus responded. “Not everyone is mature enough to live a married life. It requires a certain aptitude and grace. Marriage isn’t for everyone. Some, from birth seemingly, never give marriage a thought. Others never get asked—or accepted. And some decide not to get married for kingdom reasons. But if you’re capable of growing into the largeness of marriage, do it.”

What’s that look like?  Life-long Commitment  –  Faithfulness  –  Work out Your Difficulties

When It Seems Like Things Won’t Work…

Verse 7 continues, “Why then,” they asked, “did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?”  Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning.” 

Then here’s what 1 Corinthians 7:10-11 “A wife must not separate from her husband. But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. …

If there is no sexual sin, but you just can’t stand to be married anyway, the Bible does permit you to divorce, despite the fact that Jesus did not support that idea. But in the event, that divorce is chosen, you should remain unmarried. For the first time it dawns on me why? Because God is able to put any marriage back together again. To remarry is to close the door on reconciliation and in God’s eyes is adultery—unfaithfulness to the covenant you have made.

Mark 10:12 And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery.”

1 Corinthians 7:12-15 If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. 

[13] And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. 

[15] But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances.




In closing… Average people lose their identity to their circumstances. i believe that’s what Jesus was saying, Average people lose their identity to their circumstances. Times when i make average decisions it’s because my circumstances are driving me away from the word of God. When i shared recently in a post titled “Average… Called Out” that was the case. i became who my circumstances directed me to be versus what God intended for me to be.





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