Revealed… The Introduction #2

Posted: December 9, 2014 in Podcasts, Revealed...!
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Hello i’m dr. ed peterson the host of me and I Am. i will tell you ahead of time that today’s post feels very disjointed for me and i’ve rewritten it 5 times which by the way i never do. This has been difficult because while trying to share my personal experience i’m trying not to give away the story nor bore everyone. i’m finding it difficult to share this bundle of emotions, spiritual lessons, mental challenges, etc., etc. etc..

imagesMelissa my son’s wife had made a trip to Africa about the time they had met. Through the years they have often talked about going back as husband and wife. They also over the years have expressed their desire to possibly adopt a child. That possibility became more than that recently and they announced that they were going to start the long process of adopting a child from Africa and see what God would do. The short version of this is that after a few short months they not only found an agency that was willing to consider them but through a conversation in which they were asked, as a by the way, what were they looking for, revealed that there was possibly a three year old girl available. They had not even finished the paper work, taken the classes, jumped through the hoops, or put the finances in place. They had been told by everyone that it would be one to two years or more. But God! Things have moved very quickly and this little three year old girl is a very real possibility… enough so that the agency revealed her name and gave them a picture which they are not allowed to share at this time. Bt the way, the agency told them to pick a middle name for her and use that to refer to her as they are not allowed to use her name nor show her picture at this time. Papa will take this moment to reinforce his vote for Grace but i’m not holding my breath.

See how this ties in with the book? For me the book is not about the story of Katie… it’s much more. As i’ve said over and over it’s not a book to be read and then forget. Oh you may be able to do just that, but for me, well i’m on my third time through it and we have a small group of people who are going through it line by line and sharing how it is speaking to each of us individually.

images-1My first listen was all emotions. Every page, every chapter something would wreck me! My second listen was much more intent on hearing what i missed the first time through. Actually reading it is for highlighting. Multiple colors cover many of the pages from top to bottom.

During the second listen i received a paper from my son and wife. They told me that i needed to fill it out, get it notorized and send it back to them asap. What could be so important that i needed it notorized. The paper asked me if i would love this little girl as though she were my own. The question would have been simple but the importance placed on it by having to have it notorized meant that i couldn’t just say yes and send it off. This was more important than i had realized. God had just told me that i didn’t love people the way that Katie did and now i was being asked to put my name on a paper stating unconditionally that i would love this little girl… like Katie does.

For days the descriptions which Katie shared about the girls and their conditions raced through my mind. Prior to this it was easy to tell my children that it was a great idea and that they should go for it. They live in Reno Nevada and i live in Florida. We see each other about once a year. This is them, not me doing this, but of course i’ll support them. That’s when God revealed that everything He had revealed to me about my love had nothing to do with the past but everything to do with the present and the future.

images-3Will you love this little girl as though she were your own? my mind, will and emotions began putting my when, where, why and how into place and God said “Your mind, will and emotion have no place in this decision. Now what is your answer? Are you going to continue loving me, admiring me and worshipping me and not doing what i say?” As i listened to more and more of what God was saying through Katie and her book i began to realize more and more of what God wanted from me… and in spite of all my hesitations i wanted more of Him and what He was sharing with me.

Katie says she quit her life. i haven’t quit my whole life but i have begun to examine each piece of it more closely. While i was faced with the questions, the fears, of committing to loving this little girl which is still full of the unknown i realized that i am much more afraid of living life comfortably than i am of failing to surrender everything to God.

  1. John Viillazon says:

    “and in spite of all my hesitations i wanted more of Him and what He was sharing with me.”

    This is my favorite line, sometimes I forget to get myself out of the hesitation stage and embrace ALL GOD has for me. Thanks for the reminder.

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